Make-A-Wish Relationships

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I remember in middle school, I had a ‘boyfriend’. He used to walk to my every class, go to my basketball games, wear a bracelet with my name on it. At parties and dances, we stood together next to our friends and talked. I remember that everyone (including the teachers) knew I had a boyfriend. Now, it was no sexual stuff going on. Just pecks on the cheeks and holding hands. But the fact is that everybody knew. It was no sneaking down the back hallway or downplaying our like for each other to remain cool to our friends. Nowadays, women are cool and actually seems to enjoy being a secret. In their eyes, they don’t want nobody in their business so it could be no haters. But, in my eyes, yall women are looking desperate and tired.

Signs of a Women Suffering from Make-A-Wish Relationship
1. People don’t know his real name, actual occupation or any personal information about your man
2. You don’t celebrate holidays together (Birthdays don’t count)
3. He don’t come around like ever
4. Been together 8 years and he still have his own place
5. You’re his 4th baby mama and you’re waiting for a ring
6. Everybody knows he’s a cheater, but you stay because he will settle down
7. You’re so used to pretending that you’re happy when you are really not
8. Most of your sentences usually being with “If only he was…”
9. You’re engaged but there’s no date, no ring and he has not proposed
10. You actually related with Kenya Moore from RHOA about the Walter situation

Rico Love has a song called “They Don’t Know” and he is talking about how his girl is cool being a secret. He buys her Birkin bags, Bentley coupes and takes her shopping in fancy stores. Meanwhile, all she has to do is keep quiet about their relationship. Now, I am betting my next paycheck, that these chicks in these streets can’t get a light bill paid. They are holding it down for a man who don’t even have your back. While you are keeping him a secret, understand that his homeboys know about your ass. Think men don’t talk? Shhiiittt. (In my Clay Davis voice)

Now, I realize it may be hurtful to realize you have been in a Make-A-Wish relationship. Chile, stop wishing for a good man and become a better woman who expect more. As women, we feel that we can ‘change’ a man. We feel like Demi Moore in Ghost where Patrick Swayze is molding the perfect clay and they are so in love. We can mold clay, but we cannot mold a man. You may wanna seem like the cool chick who is down for whatever, but all you are doing is leaving yourself open for months and years of disappointment and hurt. Nobody wants to admit that they are in a deadend relationship. But the sin isn’t the relationship, it’s the choice to remain in the relationship. My advice is cut that man out of your life and focus on building yourself back up. Love is open and free and should be celebrated. Love is never a secret, ignored or bottled up. Girl, be faithful to yourself and everything else will fall in place.

Photo by stevenjamesdixon.com

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Guess Who’s Baaaaaccckkkk???????

Guess who’s back?! I know y’all all giving PynkKashmere some serious side eye right now, and honestly, we know we deserve it. If I told you all the shit that’s been going on behind the scenes and in our personal lives, you wouldn’t even believe me. But, we know we left y’all totally hanging. For that, we apologoize. But, it’s about to be a new year so what better time than any to start fresh. In 2014 we’ll keep putting out all the shit you want to hear, from fashion, men, relationships, tv shows, and everything else that comes up. Thanks for showing PynkKashmere some love, and Pynk is going to be much better in showing it back!

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Things Fall Apart

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One morning, I woke up in tears. I had a dream about everything and everyone I lost in my life. Needless to say, I felt depressed, depleted and robbed. Within the last few years, my family has suffered through murder, incarceration, the effects of war and other bullshit that tears people apart. I’ve literally seen my family disappear before my eyes. It is an empty feeling to constantly long for yesterday. People look at you differently when you admit that you are fearful of what the future holds. I am thankful that I have my family and I know things can always be worse. But I have seen things when they were better and I would do anything for those days again. Things fall apart. But the beautiful thing is that it take things to fall apart for beauty to exist in the world. In my mind, I want beauty without loss. Why do we have to lose to gain? Why does it take death to appreciate life? Are we that oblivious to the blessings around us that we have to suffer to be grateful? Sadly, I think the answer is yes. Though I have learned my lessons from each loss, each day I am slowly becoming more optimistic.

Photo by masseu.blogspot.com

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Am I Getting Too Old?

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As I watched MTV VMA Awards, I was flipping between HGTV and watching the news. I still haven’t seen the show in its entirety. I seen what was needed to be seen: Molly Cyrus smutting it up and the J.Timberlake show. Yawn on both. Sorry, but it takes more than a long tongue and flat ass in latex to get me excited. I actually felt embarrassed for her. It seemed like she was trying way hard to be obscene and relevant. Justin Timberlake sounded bad to me and that NSYNC reunion was a joke. C’mon. They were on stage for like thirty seconds. Even ole boy JC was trying to adlib for a few more seconds on shine. I understand that the group couldn’t sing every song. But at least give some shine to the group that started you off. People were talking and I had no idea who they were. I just felt like an old lady.

Lately, I have been shopping online for some fun clothes. I’m talking really cute stuff. I bought some peplum tops, all black romper, fitted jeans and some effortless dresses. In my mind, I go out like every weekend and party with rich socialites. In reality, my ass be riding the couch like a magic carpet. I’m a boss like that. Anyhow, my husband asked me about my shoes. I gave him the look of death. The last time I wore high heels, my feet sweated like crazy and I walked like Frakenstein. I was in so much pain. I remember walking in six inch platforms…What the fuck happened? It’s true that I have been flipflopping forever. So, I did what most women wouldn’t do. I gave most of my platforms to my younger sister. Yeah, she thought it was a joke. I was dead serious.

Have you felt like you were getting old? Or is it just getting mature? Or just plain lazy? Yeah, I could have practiced with my high heels, but I got this thing called a Kindle Fire that takes up all of my time. What makes you feel old?

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Random Thoughts from a Pynk Woman

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Some women live in fear in their relationships because they feel their men will get bored, listless or just plain over being monogamous. You can find these women at your local gym, hair salon, nail salon or department store trying to be cute because they got to look good for their man. While I am down for looking good, these women are focused on the outward appearance. What would happen if we would work on our inside as much as we work on the outside?

Before I am a good wife, I have to be good to me. May sound selfish, but it is true. How can I uplift someone else if I am constantly dogging myself out? Our society teaches women to be selfless soldiers in the name of love, family and peace. I think that’s bullshit. At the end of the day, all you have is a tired, resentful woman who feels that nobody appreciates what she does. It takes sacrifice to be good to someone, but most people don’t see their gift right away. It takes years and a lot of reflection to be grateful to someone who is selfless and sacrifices. I believe that you are your best ally. If you don’t have your own back, why should anyone else run to your rescue? Having good family and friends are cool, but when you lie down at night, it’s just you and your thoughts.

I used to think that working on your inside (soul, spirit and emotional well-being) means sitting in church on Sunday morning. That is always good, but what about the rest of the week? But now I know that happiness truly comes from within. Not from compliments, good days or gooey desserts. Is happiness a lifestyle, a state of mind or emotion? Sometimes, I am not sure. Sure, I am grateful for a lot of things, but there will always be sad times, days and episodes of my life in which I can’t see the good in my life. Does that make me ungrateful, unhappy or just sad?

I’m having moments in my life in which I don’t know how to respond. Honesty isn’t always the best policy. Silence can be misconstrued as indifference. Kind words can sound cliché or condescending. Hell, I don’t even know what to say. Truth is, I don’t have a lot to say in normal circumstances. (It takes me a while to process information.) So, I definitely don’t know what to say when bombs are going off. Eventually, I hope to know what to say and maybe these people will take my words with love and understanding.

Photo by slodive.com

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Every Seat in Yankee Stadium

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This girl needs to have more than several seats. The average house has only one living room. This thang needs to book a flight (buy 2 seats for that ass) and visit Yankee Stadium. Girl, have several thousand seats. I would love to hear from men who find this girl attractive. I mean, I’m not even hating. I am just curious. According to the comments on mediatakeout.com, someone mentioned that she went from a size 2-4 to a size 14. Ugh! Who wants to buy bigger clothes? All these girls wear is spandex. Where do they work? Okay, I already answered the question. Where do they plan to work in the future? And she standing there holding that towel like that’s what an ass supposed to do. Chile, snatch your life. I would kill to see her bank account. Probably paid thousands in ass, but got pennies at Wells Fargo. Now, I am not opposed to a nip, tuck and enhance, but looking like a Chiron in a bathroom. Chile, please. What do you think? Is this the future of asses? Or will we see asses on top of kneecaps in a few years?

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Girl, Have Several Seats.

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Now, I love me some Joseline Hernandez. She is everything I would be in a stereotyped reality star. Full of drama and plastic, brutally honest with a Chanel bag. Oh yeah, add some 32 inch weave. But this song here must be shared with the masses. I’m not sure what she was thinking. Stevie J need to have several seats as well. Did they think this was good? Couldn’t have.Tell us what you think. I think my eyes threw up. Just a little bit. Joseline, please have several seats.

http://www.worldstarhiphop.com/videos/video.php?v=wshhSt68XBdmv1T5FgDa

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Say It Ain’t So!! Queen Bey Gets Snatched Up

Beyonce is currently promoting the North American Leg of her tour, “The Mrs. Carter Show”. We all know she loves her weaves/wigs, unitards, and her fans. If you’ve ever been to one of her shows or even watched her perform on television, she ALWAYS has fans on stage to keep that hair blowing in the wind. Well, last night in Canada, she probably wishes she did not have that fan. While performing “Halo”, her weave got caught in the damn fan!! Yes, you read correctly! Her weave got caught in the fan!!!

Lol!!!!!!!!!!!! I am the biggest Beyonce fan, but fan or not, that shit was pure comedy! How embarrassing! But, she remained in good spirits about it because she kept on singing. People trying to untangle her hair, pulling and tugging on it, all while she’s belting out her song. She even poked fun at herself, posting a hand written note on her Instagram, which said:

Gravity can’t begiiiiiiiiiin
to pull me out of the fan again
I felt my hair was yankiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiin
From the fan that’s always hatiiiiiiin
Virgin, Remy, and Malaysiiiiiiaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan

I got snatched
“2 snaps”

Goodnight all,

B

That damn Beyonce takes a licking and keeps on ticking. She keeps going and going. Energizer Bunny Who? I guess the show must go on.

Would you have kept on singing? Click below for the video.

http://www.youtube.com/embed/gpHT8_LJQ_M?rel=0frameborder=0allowfullscreen/iframe”>

Link courtesy of: Montreality514

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20 Random Thoughts I Had While Watching LAHHATL

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So, this week I am going to switch things up a bit. I didn’t have any deep, thought-provoking, critical analyses of Love & Hip Hop. Instead, I found myself saying or thinking random thoughts about the show. So here are my 20 random musings about the show:

1. It’s not me, it’s your ass! That’s what Rasheeda needs to tell Kirk. He is a lying, cheating, unemployed snake who is feeling a bit insecure. In the words of Tamar Braxton, “He tried it!”
2. Scrappy is not that bright. Smiznieh (Or however you spell that stupid way he talks)? That means smoking for all us regular folks.
3. Why isn’t Mama Dee’s edges ever smooth?! Like ever! She always looks like she needs to slap some perm and some gel on them edges. Oh yeah, can she stop with all the palace and kingdom talk?
4. You ain’t gots to lie, Craig. You ain’t gots to lie. Why did Traci’s boyfriend lie so Drew could have that smirk on his face? Traci told that man she has trust issues. He should’ve told the truth. I don’t blame Traci for having a zero tolerance policy.
5. Was it just me or was the first half of the episode full of nasty looking food? What the hell was everybody cooking? Spaghetti? Sloppy Joes? Chili? Ugh!
6. Papa J prays fast! What did he say when he blessed that food? Lol!
7. Kirk shouldn’t wear all yellow. It makes him look banana-ish.
8. If Mimi and Kirk have known each other for such a long time, then why doesn’t she know that his name is “Kirk” and not “Kurt”? She said it wrong the entire episode.
9. Mimi made some good points when she tried to help Kirk’s ass! My favorite line was, “Are the $2 hoes gonna help you raise your kids?” Hell no Kirk…they ain’t!
10. So Kirk about to be on Baby #6? Damn Gina!!! That’s why he trippin’.
11. Why does Ariane’s apartment building look like a dorm? Is she a student at Spelman or Clark Atlanta and nobody told me? Lol!
12. So Ariane “came out”? Who cares? She knows she wants to hook up with K. Michelle. Plus, Kirk already outed that “secret” a while back on Twitter.
13. Joseline referred to Karlie Redd as “Auntie Karlie”. That chick is hilarious!
14. Why is Traci’s apartment so empty? Is it her just for tv place or did she recently move in?
15. So Drew let me get this straight. You don’t want Traci, but you don’t want her with the next guy. Then you think you can get her back, but you can’t. So you expose her boyfriend’s skeletons then feel bad afterwards? Yea, are you confused after reading that? Don’t feel bad. So is he.
16. Karlie Redd is persistent, isn’t she? I can’t knock her. But, she should find a new hustle. That rapping/singing she doing is not a good look.
17. Karlie calling Joseline Jose was funny! You know that’s what people think anyway.
18. When the social worker told Scrappy that his daughter would either be a freshman at Spelman college majoring in something wonderful or the main attraction at Magic City, that was deep. It definitely got his attention.
19. The ring Joseline bought for Stevie J looked fake…kinda like that “Rolex” ol boy got Mimi a few episodes back.
20. Shirlene, Rasheeda’s Mother, bout that life!

What did you think of this week’s episode?

Photo credit: inflexwetrust.com

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Race to the Finish Line

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The verdict is in and George Zimmerman is a free man. I knew he would get away with it. Never had a doubt. Why? The key witness is dead. How can you argue with a dead man? Also, I don’t believe our court system is as fair and just as it should be. People are protesting on both sides and both of them want to persuade the other side that they are right. Whether you wanted Zimmerman free or under the prison, the truth remains: Trayvon Martin died that night. He will never get to tell his side of the story. I goggled Trayvon Martin’s pictures and I saw some pics released of him blowing smoke, pointing the middle finger and showing off his grill. I guess this was a way to show that he wasn’t the little, innocent boy that the media is portraying him to be. I get it. Maybe some people want the accurate picture. Maybe some people wanted to say “He is a thug! Look at him! He did threaten George!” Or maybe some people are just curious. Who knows? He was a teenage boy. Of course, he is going to do some things that stray away from his parents’ teachings. Hell, I’m 28 and I am still off-track at times. People love to kick a man while he is down, or in this case, while he is dead. I heard that pictures of his dead body were released to the public. Why? Who needs to see that? Sorry, I just believe in respecting the dead. Maybe that idea is Southern and old-fashioned.

I didn’t watch the trial. Just the verdict. Silently, I prayed for Trayvon’s family to have peace and strength while they relived the awful details of that day. Grief is hard when you are alone and nobody knows your name. I can’t imagine how it would feel when the cameras are rolling. Regardless of who and what Trayvon was, he deserved a chance at life. Just like we all do. Whether he wore a gold grill or penny loafers, Trayvon did not deserve to die. I’m not going to trash-talk the jurors. They have spoken and we must respect their judgment. And move forward. But we can’t ignore the message that it sends: It is okay to kill people who you feel that may be a threat to you. Regardless of what color you are, that is a scary reality. Maybe now we can have conversations about gun laws, racism, flawed justice systems, protests and the reckless media. I know the answer isn’t hating the other side for not agreeing with us. Maybe after all these years, we all could talk instead of scream. I am not much of an activist. I probably won’t ever hold a sign and walk the streets. And I’m definitely not getting arrested for any cause, But I think if we all do a part to make the world a better place, things would improve.

Last year, I heard about Trayvon Martin and I was watching all the updates on CNN. As a black woman, I feared for the future of our men and boys. The odds are already stacked against them. I felt inspired to write something on how I was feeling at the time. So here goes:

Race to the Finish Line

To justify a murder
Just say he is big and black
The racists will nod their heads
Give their support for an attack
Is it about race?
Is it about laws?
It’s about the truth which
Highlights America’s twisted flaws
Wait for the facts
Some people may say
But the concrete opened its mouth
And took Trayvon’s light that awful day
A month later, we still bicker and fight
Watch the news in the morning
CNN later on that night
People arguing their truths
And they never know what it’s like
To be black in a white man’s world
It’s an endless circle of a fight
Today justice missed its bus
So tired so it slept in late
A mother is still crying
On this dreadful March date
If this is the land of the free
Then I need to be charged
If this is my ultimate destiny
Then why justice served seems so hard
Until then I will race to the
Finish line where nobody seems to be
Hopefully I won’t get shot
Because I chose to wear a hoodie

 

Photo by phawker.com

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